Mile 1 my adrenaline was pumping at a rapid rate. I was ready to conquer this marathon regardless of weather. Rain or shine, it wasn't going to stop me from finishing what I set out to accomplish on December 4th. The first 9 miles I was accompanied by my friend Rhonda who kept me focused on the task at hand. By mile 13 I was on fire. I knew that the rest I had taken the past few weeks was just what I needed... My body was ready.
Then, at mile 14 it all went down hill... Rain began to pour & I couldn't see too far in front of me. I was getting soaked. About that same time my watch started beeping at me... I had totally forgot to check to see if it needed to be charged the night before & thought it was "fully" charged. Awesome. I had lost my GPS AND all feeling in my body. I was completely numb. Mile 16 my body began to shake. By mile 19 I couldn't talk and I sure couldn't get my Cliff Gel out of my belt. The cold wind in my face & rain coming down kept me shaking. Mile 20 it was over. A nice gentlemen from the medic tent stopped me to pull me aside & take care of me. I was not in a healthy condition to continue to the finish line. Hypothermia had officially set in & I was not able to go any further.
I don't know what was worse... Feeling extremely nauseous, unable to tell them my name, the constant shaking (my body was way too tired to shake this much), or my pride & the fact that I not only let myself down but felt the weight of everyone else I had let down. I don't think I ever felt so bad in so many ways at one time.
My WONDERFUL husband came to my rescue, carried me to the car, & was my hero. He not only took care of me, but he taught me a huge lesson through this experience. He never told me I messed up, said he was disappointed in me, or encouraged me to give up. He simply showed me love..... even when I was just plain negative about the whole thing. It's in those moments when we need a reality check the most... I definitely got one.
After 48 hours of non-stop thinking about those last 6 miles I had to finish & praying about what the next step should be I have come to a conclusion. You see, the lesson my husband taught me was this..... Never give up. When you have a plan & things don't go your way that you canNOT control (like weather)...keep going. Take it in & deal with it... Just because you have a bad experience (in my case that was my 2nd bad experience) learn from it & keep going. No matter how many times you fall down keep getting back up... again & again & again. My husband shows me this everyday in his career. Baseball is a game of failure, not a game of "failures" because tomorrow they will be right back at it again & again. Make sense?
You only fail if you quit... quitting is NOT an option.
With all of that said, I will be running 26.2 miles in a few weeks. My husband & I will be mapping out a 26.2 route in Oklahoma. I WILL run a marathon. I have set goals & have every intention of meeting those goals. I mean, why not? My goal has been to run 26.2 miles before we have another baby... 1. I really want another baby 2. I finish what I start.
There you have it! What are you letting defeat you today that is out of your control? Don't let circumstances control you. All you can do is all you can do!
Go after what you have set out to do! It will be so worth it in the end!
I AM an athlete. I AM strong. I AM going to finish. I AM all of these things but not from my own strength... I can do ALL things through Christ who gives me strength (Phil 4:13) through the Holy Spirit & through the ones around me every step of the way. I could not do this without your love & support. Glory goes to God in everything I do. ***A HUGE shout out to all who sent me encouraging texts, Facebook posts, messages, calls, etc! I cannot tell you how loved I felt on Sunday! You all are what kept my head up! Thank you SO much for your love, prayers, & continuous support!
26.2 miles... you are doing DOWN.
*p.s. I plan on sharing more details of where I will be running soon. It will take me 2 weeks or so to be ready physically again!